I hate that I fell for the wrong person
With no wrong reasons
A time right for me
Yet the farthest for them
My feeling now dissipated
But I forever see-
Icarus’s fate across my surface
The reddened relished wrinkled maze
Scabbed and scarred as time progressed
Of a permanent mark
Forever bound onto my body
As a reminder of my love for you
This forbidden fantasy
Brings emotion to my life
Serving as a sunlight canopy
Hiding all my worries underneath
Thawing the mortal snow
Chionodoxa dancing its arrival
Delicate lyres sound to life
Though with each string comes a painful strike
Reliving my eternal punishment
I see this day as if my last
Your head on my shoulder
Our tangled fingers, hair, and souls
All infused in one melodic strain
As music swells
My ears full and rich
Golden silhouettes lingering on your cape
Pruned and rich as if Athena’s fingers fell across
Yet even your locks of dusky night
Or permanent seas of Poseidon’s green
Could not stop me from Icarus’s doom
For I had built my wings of wax
Foolishly flying, begging for more
Only to be greeted with a pain filled death
As you were never mine
Forbidden not by chains or gates
But by only mortal will
Known to all but my gullible self
Plummeting to salt and rock filled depths
I remember regretting
Praying and begging
To only return to our field once more
Freed of my convicted verdict
To be content with what I have
Yet only my flammable tinder body
Blood red hibiscus enclosing
Newly charred, blackened skin
Remain as a memorial to you
Of you
My precious, lost desire
Now nothing but a ballad
Played only when the lanterns glow
Sung only under the watchful drunken moon
Fireflies dancing on your grave
I sit isolated
Weeping for your loss
And for my everlasting mistakes
For were I brave-
I would march the very underworld
Orpheus’s lyre in my hand
Kill the very Gods and Titans
Scorch the earth until you were freed
Ridding my past sins and bodies away
But I am nothing but a coward
One who hides from fears afar
Building flower crowns for my beloved
Only to have them rot and forgotten
Now nothing but a souvenir on their grave
I feel no more passion to you
Now that I’ve grown wiser and older
Yet my seared and scarred skin
Will still ignite within a single chord
Of your tender timid songs
Your welcomes, delights, and comforts
Of an everlasting beauty
Now nothing but an echo
I cradle my wounded body
Broken and burned from my own faults
I will forever hide myself from you
For you knowing your accidental damage
The fallout of my selfish thought
Aired in our beloved field
Will hurt me more
Than your kindred flame could ever see
Skillful hands holding up my own
Providing an emotion I do not wish to process
As you gently lay me into agonized Tartarus
For I deserve this far more greater
Than I deserve my life and air
Though not a day
An hour
A second
Goes by in my mind
That I do not remember you-
Your marble statue of a perfected body
Eternal pools of gazing moss and sun
And locks spun of Dionysus’s wine and ink
As if the very Gods had crafted you,
Providing you a life I could never once give myself
For it would be wrong and unjust of me
To ever once again receive your presence
Yet I had done so
And marred your beauty
Spilling only anger and hurt to light
Confessing to a love I should’ve kept to myself
For I had somehow known my words would lead to humiliation
As Eros’s arrows hit me twice instead us both
I’m forced to carry this burden as a punishment
Yet I will do so gladly
Watching my skin age vines of blue and creases
Living with the guilt of a hurtful desire
Remaining rueful to myself
That with all my wrongs of a life I’ve created
Love was never meant to be a right
