Repetition

The familiar tingling started at my feet and electrified my whole body as I gasped awake. It was dark like normal and a little chilly which was also standard. I was sitting comfortably in the same spot that I’ve always been in. Above me the wind was circulating like an oscillating fan but like usual there was nothing. I couldn’t see more than two feet in front of me and as I inhaled the icy cold air, my lungs cut like tiny razors. I attempted to reach my chest but once again the searing ropes stopped my grip. 

By this point I’ve gotten used to the ambiance of the situation. The panic began to set in and my eyes drifted around the room. To the far left of me there was the same small window that had been there for years with the identical piercing white light burning through the room.  The sun bleached wood that bordered the cracked glass gave off an eerie noise. The twin eager feeling in my stomach, that tells me to run, was going off like a siren.

 Even still I couldn’t move. I struggled and cut my arms on the rope but it was no use. No matter how much I wanted to. I sat still in my wobbly desk knowing what would happen next. A silhouette cast a shadow over the bright light entering through the window. The intensity of the light was contradicted by the dullness of the silhouette. Though I have lived through this scenario a thousand times over, it still felt as suspenseful as the first. But then the window slowly cracked into oblivion. 

The wiry figure stood for a few seconds. Long bony fingers reached around the glass on the same wooden border. A nastey grumbling and breathing noise came from the creep. The beast twisted its limbs through the broken glass. Once the ghastly monster entered the dark room. It spun its distorted spine in many directions as if it was searching until it abruptly stopped.  Contouring it’s frail, elongated looking body towards me. A single finger slowly rose and pointed at me. ¨YOU¨ shouted the creep. I wanted to look away but I noticed it again just like I always do. A flash of the reflected light bounced off the long blade. It disappeared and reappeared after every limped step closer it got to me. The light completely blocked its face so I’ve never known who or what it was. I watched again as the blade rose slowly. 

The beautiful metal glimmered in my eyes. The soft gush of wind brushed my long hair against my face. It was warm, I grasped for warmth. It was the only thing that I wanted, that I wanted to feel again. I felt it piercing in and out of my abdomen. I glanced at the blade quickly tearing into my tethered flesh where my scar was. Maybe the first few times I cried or was in horrible pain but now, now I feel nothing. All I was doing was witnessing. I felt like a ghost stuck in my own body. There just was nothing for me to do. I was as cold as the room in my repetition. My eyes slowly winced closed and the silhouette disappeared again. The shattered glass from the window reversed into its previous state. I felt the tingling at my feet again and awakened for a number that I couldn’t count. It’s restarted. Welcome to my Repetition!

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