The Flood

Grief hits me like a flood,

And suddenly I’m falling. 

I can’t hold myself up anymore,

So I sink to the ground

Kneeling down

My head bowed low.

I plead and pray for you to come back

But I don’t get an answer.

I know I never will.

I recover quickly from my little episode,

But I see a picture of you

Tubes attached

Smiling weakly. 

I start to cry.

I am no longer brave

I am no longer strong

I’m just a little girl

Who didn’t want you to die.

Sometimes I’m angry that you didn’t stay longer,

Sometimes I’m sad.

But sometimes I’m happy because of all the memories I have.

I know it’s selfish

For me to want you back

When you needed to be put out of your misery.

But I want you to see who I am today,

And who I want to be.

I want you to see how smart I am

How brave I am

How kind I am.

And I want you to see how successful I am

How funny I am

How grown I am.

And I want you to know how I still sink to the floor

My heart writhing in pain

Because you aren’t here with me. 

And I want you to know how much I loved you.

How much I do love you.

How much I miss you.

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